Navigating the Energy of Money in Relationships

money heart

The dawning of a new day is upon us. We are leaving behind an era in which money has been misused to create distraction, injustice and destruction on the planet. We have sadly witnessed lives around us be consumed by greed, and lack spiritual purpose.

As awakening beings, we have rebelled against the financial system in search of a more meaningful existence. We have invested instead in our health, happiness, and the expansion of our consciousness. We have learned how to relate to our bodies as temples, we have been in workshops and ceremonies to heal our family lineage and past trauma, and we have traveled to sacred sites, asking Great Spirit to guide our lives. We have inquired about who we are and why we are on the planet, and we make steps every day to align with our truth and purpose. We have come a long way, and yet our ‘spiritual quest’ has not yet led us to master the energy of money in a conscious way.

A new era, however, is upon us, in which we are called to heal our relationship with money so that we may come into alliance with this form of energy and channel it into the creation of the New Earth that we are collectively visioning at this time. Just like us, money itself seeks liberation! At its very essence, money is a form of energy, or “monergy.” It is neither good nor bad, but simply a tool and means to exchange and create with. We no longer have to avoid money in order to live spiritual lives. The time is now to integrate a healthy relationship with money into our lives, our partnerships, and into our collective conscious culture.

When creating a shared life with a partner, the topic of finances ultimately must be discussed. And as many of us know, disagreements with finances has been one of the most significant factors leading to separation and divorce. There is no wonder why our bodies may contract when initiating a conversation about money and how to handle expenses. So, how do we navigate these waters in a conscious and loving way?
You may have heard the phrase, “communication is the best lubrication”… well this goes for creating ease around finances too! The more we practice having these conversations, the easier they get. And the more present, loving, and compassionate we are during these conversations, the more gracefully they will begin to flow.

Here are some simple suggestions about how to initiate the conversation within your relationship:
Create “prosperity dates” that designate specific times to talk about money. Make these dates enjoyable by bringing some of your favorite snacks or ordering from your favorite restaurant (something low maintenance and decadent).

Before you begin, take a moment to call in support from your higher Selves and any other energies that you feel will be supportive. For your first prosperity date, allow time to share some of your deeper beliefs about money and what comes up for you around handling finances.
Create a safe space where you are both held in diving into and revealing some of the uncomfortable places within yourself.

What meaning do you attach to money?

What have you learned about money in your lifetime?

What did your parent’s relationship to money teach you?

Check in with your self-worth and security. How secure do you feel in your contributions to this partnership and to the world?

How worthy do you feel of giving and receiving?

Allow this space to be about an emotional connection rather than specifics around managing finances. When we know our partner’s tender places, we can hold them with love and compassion as we move forward.
On your next prosperity date, allow an opportunity for both of you to share about your financial history: How much money you have made/ are making/ or have inherited, what investments you have, and what assets you own. Share any credit card debt or student loans you may have, and how you have been managing your payments. Your financial histories and habits may be similar, or they may be very different. For some, this conversation may bring up judgement or unresolved shame, either for having money or for not having money. Hold the seat of unconditional acceptance, for both yourself and your partner during this sharing. See if you can relate to this conversation as an inquiry and opportunity to understand your partner at a deeper level. Stay curious and open.

During your next prosperity date, invite a conversation about your dreams. What would you like to create as a reality in your life? Do you want to own a home? Where would you like to live? What are the important pieces of your vision that you are absolutely committed to? Share individually and then together, you can start to create a shared vision for your life. You can keep honing this vision all the time, as well as make vision boards and altars, and use affirmations to support the manifestation of your desires. Later, you can work on more grounded financial plans to support you in achieving these shared goals.

On your next prosperity date you may choose to open the conversation about how to combine your finances. When we are living, traveling, and eating most meals together, it makes sense to come up with a mutually agreed upon plan for covering these shared expenses. There are various models you can use to help create a plan that’s right for both of you.

Check out this article by Forbes magazine that outlines 5 different models for combining finances with your partner:

http://www.forbes.com/sites/learnvest/2012/09/10/how-to-combine-finances-with-your-partner/.

Discuss each of them with your partner and see if there is one that feels aligned for both of you at this time. Perhaps you can use your creativity and insight to come up with a unique plan that is just right for both of you. On your next date you can take steps to start the process of actually combining your finances.

Continue to schedule prosperity dates with your partner at least once per month. Bring any outstanding bills or records of payments to the date so that you can go over them with your partner. Remember that each date is an opportunity for you to take one step closer to manifesting the shared vision for your life together. While these conversations can be uncomfortable at first, with consistent practice and a commitment to bring our full loving attention to each conversation…they do become easier to navigate. As we overcome our fear around money, we open our hearts to it. We free it from bondage and allow it to bless our lives.

Lizzy Z. Martini

For More Inspiration on Creating a Conscious Relationship, Check out my Conscious Love 101-Free Online Course.

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